how about an IQ test for customers?

We're contemplating having all potential customers answer a couple of questions before agreeing to maintain their property.  

question #1
When you receive an invoice in the mail, do you
a.  pay it promptly
b. file it in the "to be paid" folder
c. throw it away and hope to receive a second notice
d. write "addressee unknown" on the envelope and return it

question #2
When you have questions about your bill or service received, do you
a. do nothing for several months and then refuse to pay your bill because the service sucked 8 months ago
b. call the office but hang up if the answering machine picks up and then refuse to pay your bill because no one ever called you back
c.  call another landscaping company, have them mow your lawn and expect the first company to pay


my brain hurts.....

This week's "Huh?" award goes to....

message on answering machine:  "There's no way I owe you for February.  I mailed the check on March 9th.  I don't know what you did with it but I'm only paying for March."

conversation between confused client and me

Me:  "I have no record of having received that check.  Has it cleared the bank?"

CC:  "No...I've been checking online and it hasn't cleared yet.  But I mailed it on March 9th...you should have it by now"

Me:  "I obviously didn't receive it.   Can you please reissue it?"

CC:  "That will cost me $20.   I will reissue it for $30 instead of $50"

Me:  "No...you owe us $50 for services rendered in February.  You will need to reissue for the full amount"

CC:  "It's not my fault you didn't receive it.  I mailed it on March 9th.   I'll split the cost of the stop payment with you and reissue for $40"

(I'm pretty much dying at this point...seriously?)

Me:  "Noooo.....I have no proof that you actually mailed me a check.  If you have a receipt from the post office, I will split the cost with you.  Otherwise, you will need to convince the post office to pay for the stop payment and you will need to mail me a check for $50"

CC:  "THAT'S RIDICULOUS...I DON'T GET RECEIPTS FOR EVERY BILL I MAIL"

Me:  "I understand, but you owe me $50 and I have no way of knowing that a check has been mailed and lost.  Do you call the electric company if a check gets lost and ask them to credit you for the amount of the check?"

CC: "No...they are a big company and wouldn't do that....."

Me:  "We're a small company and we won't do that either....I'll expect your check for $50 by the end of the week..Thank you"


love my life.....

Stupid is Contagious

Facebook statuses (statii/status...whatever) have an amazing way of making my head hurt. 

I have several VERY conservative friends.    I have several VERY liberal friends.  I have friends who don't have enough backbone to decide if they are conservative or liberal and I have friends who are intelligent enough to  actually take things on a case-by-case basis. 

anyways.....my current rant.....

After the events in Arizonza, my liberal friends posted stuff about how Palin and her tea party beliefs may have played a part in the shootings.   My conservative friends wrote incredibly long blogs about freedom of speech and how she has the right to say anything she wants....

I said nothing....

Today my conservative friends are posting stuff about President Obama and the behavior of attendees at the memorial service tonight.    (the whistling and cheering during the service)   My liberal friends didn't watch the service so they have no idea what my conservative friends are talking about.... (you know, cuz liberals aren't patriotic enough to watch the memorial)

I may have tweeted something about stupid people needing to shut up and drink their tea.....maybe....